So you matched with someone you actually want to talk to. Great! Now what? The first message matters more than people realize. It sets the tone and shows whether you’re thoughtful or just sending the same line to everyone.

Avoid messages like “hey” or “what’s up.” They’re too generic and don’t give the other person anything to work with. A good opener shows you’ve read their profile and want to connect for a reason.

Try something simple but specific: “Your dog is adorable. What’s their name?” or “You mentioned Italy in your bio—what was your favorite part of the trip?”

Compliments can work, but keep them respectful and sincere. Instead of “You’re hot,” say something like “You have such a warm smile—made me want to say hi.”

Funny openers also work well if humor is your thing. Just avoid anything that could be misunderstood. Think playful, not edgy.

Ask a question they can actually answer. Open-ended ones work best. For example: “If you could instantly master any skill, what would it be?”

Also, don’t overthink it. One good line is better than a long essay. The goal is to start a conversation, not impress them with a paragraph.

And if someone doesn’t respond? It’s okay. Don’t take it personally. Dating is a numbers game sometimes, and everyone’s at a different place.

Lead with curiosity, kindness, and confidence. That combo always stands out.